Friday 4 March 2011

Lost soul

Exactly what i said to a superior upon seeking her advise and guidance.
Lost soul because I shrivel into this unknown person.
Lost soul because I don't know where I'm heading.
Lost soul because everything is overwhelming.

Some say I can easily adapt to any situation.
Simply said, throw me into a sea of crocodile and I'll survive through and through.
I say, all those are myths.
I don't know where I gained my courage before.
I don't know where I gained my strength before.
I don't even know who I am now.

Fear of the unknown they said. They dismissed my plea.
Now is no longer unknown. The fear is apparent.
My premonition was right. My instinct was right. My gut is right.

Speaking all these here takes off the burden i feel on my shoulder. I feel lighter. At least for a bit. And thank goodness it's Friday. I shall not cry today.

A lil something that tickled my tummy and gave me some hope -

"Shuhadah. It is a priority to me when one is not happy in one's post. Let me digest this and see if I can find the torch light first and shine it to you"

Happy weekend everyone. 

Exactly 21 days more until I am a wife. And the husband to be is not anywhere near here to comfort me. He is away. Working. Not in another country. But far enough for me to see him.I miss him.

6 comments:

Athena said...

Shuey!!!! :(
aku terkejut giler masa dapt tau bout ur new posting tu
hang in there , must be really though on you
stay strong, babe!

shueyshoelove said...

ayu: gila kan? aku tak tahu lah macam mana nak bertahan. only ppl like you get it when i say its crazy! =(

Ummu Auni said...

shuey pindah mana?

Girl Behind A Shadow said...

Shuey, I'm so sorry that u have still have not adapted to your post.

I understand it's super difficult, but try to hang on a little more longer.

Apapun, I'm always here to lend u an ear. Hopefully things will work out soon for you..

shueyshoelove said...

hida: thanks babe. the heart is still on here. i feel like running away. FAR!!

Twiggy said...

you're not lost Shuey... :) he 'found' you :)